Be careful what you wish for.
After my uneventful jury duty day, I was feeling restless and met up with a Cute Boy Who Shall Remain Nameless for drinks. Things went well, so I had the brilliant idea of showing him the view from the piers in Long Island City. Romantic, right? Yeah, the Mayoress has game.
We roll up, get rockstar parking, and walk over. There's a police barricade fence thing blocking the side entrance, no biggie, we go in, there are other people on the piers. Then we hear some guy yell, "Watch out! The cops are coming! It's the state police and they don't mess around!"
My date and I go different ways and seconds later, there's a flashlight on me. I get called over by Mr. MeanyPants NYPD Officer and stupidly remember someone I know getting out of charges by giving a false name. Leave me alone, I'd had a few drinks by that time.
Obvs the name doesn't check out in the system, so I give him my real info, and he makes me get in the cop car and threatens me with arrest and a night at central booking. In Queens.
After I ball my eyes out he gives me a ticket with a criminal court date of August 10. I get out of the car and get the hell out of there. My date and I find each other and I can't decide whether I'm more worried about the ticket or my eyes being all red in front of such a cute guy. He apologizes profusely, buys me a stiff drink, and the rest is not appropriate for this blog.
So! Rally together, Meet The Presslerians! Make your posters, get your "Free The Mayoress" tees, and meet me at the Queens County Courthouse for some real Law & Order type shit! Word.
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I'm saying that when the Mayoress does it, that means it's not illegal!
ReplyDeleteGosh. The tears didn't work? My advice is to always carry around your pocket Asian*. I get people out of EVERYTHING. Clearly these cops meant business. Must be that "fill the quota" thing.
ReplyDelete*Performance varies.
my pocket asian works for the nypd!
ReplyDeleteI know how much you wanted to see the legal system in action, but, believe me, you would have been called again for jury duty in the future. Ah, but you have never been one to give up easily, dear Daughter! So were you carrying a placard? What was the protest? Did you try singing "We Shall Overcome?" (It worked well in the Sixties) Or were you tormented by someone's offensive fashion faux pas which brought out your uncivility?
ReplyDeleteFear not: Mary and I are promoting a bake sale for your defense fund: "Free the Mayoress!" Try not to use the race card:; it's so last century. Love you!!
Peace and Power to the People!!