NY Times Social Q's Sucks

I love advice columns. LOOOOVE. If I could write one I'd be the happiest clam in the raw bar plateau. But I don't. So I'll critique.

Today I finally realized what doesn't sit right with me about the relatively new New York Times Style column "Social Q's." The advice tries harder to be cute than to be helpful. But more than that, Philip Galanes only (kinda) answers the questions asked (he's too busy making cute pronouncements rather than sticking to the story, much like how Family Guy hides behind non sequiturs while South Park artfully works its points into the plot), unlike The Divine Dan Savage, who not only fully answers the query at hand but provides teachable moments for all of us, whether we can relate to the exact issue described. THAT is how a good advice columnist advises.



But week after week, the Times allows Galanes to phone it in. Take today, f'rinstance:

My former boss and I parted on unfriendly terms more than six months ago. But I recently discovered that the company is still using my voice on its answering machine. I don’t feel comfortable with this. How do I get my voice off that tape?

Anonymous

It’s like watching reruns of “Sex and the City” now that we know that Carrie and Samantha hate each other in real life, right?

Your request is reasonable. Probably, no one at the company remembers it’s you — or can figure out how to change the message, if they do. Send your old employer a friendly note: “Hope you’re doing well, Boss Man. Now that I’m gone, please take my voice off your answering machine.”

That should do it. If not, ask for royalties. Start with a million bucks and negotiate down.

First of all, Philip, all the girls on SATC love each other because they are soulmates pls reference Season 4 Episode 1 now lay off. As it relates to this writer, correct answer is: at most any company nowadays, the work you produce at the company is owned by the company (and usually that is also in your employment contract), so unless you're a member of the voiceover union/AFTRA/the mob, if your voice was part of your professional contribution (and you were paid, remember?), the recording is property of the company.

What-what, Galanes. Gauntlet: thrown down. NY Times: you know where to reach me.