Breakfast you can believe in

What to do if the unthinkable happens...

Thanks to Aaron L. for the Halloween humor.


Dear Red States,

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes California , Hawaii , Oregon , Washington , Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas , Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty and Empire State Building. You get Dollywood. We get Apple, Intel, Cisco, and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Yale. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama. We get two-thirds of the tax revenue. You now get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that New California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford, Cal Tech
and MIT. With the Red states, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University , Clemson and the University of Georgia. We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

Finally, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,
Blue States

Why Phillies Win = Obama Win

It's simple. Obama is the Hope candidate. When people see signs of the impossible, the hopeful, when their optimism is restored, they'll be more likely to believe in the unlikely candidate, to take a chance in the polls. That's my theory. So McCain might as well pull out of Pennsylvania right now.

Oh, and a new note on McCain's lame suggestion that Obama's super awesome TV program last night inappropriately delayed the Series -- not only did Fox itself (Fox!) state that the first pitch doesn't go out until around 8:30 and therefore only the pregame was being "interrupted", but let's all remember what delayed the NFL opener by one and a half hours this fall? Hint: rhymes with SchmcCain's Bunvention Peach.

And Heeeeeeere's Barry!

Is anyone more excited than I am for tonight's Barack TV special?!

I love how the haters are trying to blame Obama's Campaign for delaying the second half of the rained-out world series game. Um, hello -- this Obama show was scheduled long before that game got rained out. Why don't they blame God, who made it rain the other night, huh? Hmm, maybe the new scheduling will make more people watch the Obama special... whose side is God on now, GOP??

If nothing else, let's all thank this campaign for making SNL watchable again. Here's their hilarious take on what tonight's special should look like:

The Most Important Races You're Not Watching

1. New York State Senate.
Did you know the New York State Senate is dominated by Republicans? How do you think that affects your taxes? Social programs? Health care? Recognition of gay marriages performed in other states? But Dems have a chance to get their house back this year, and it hinges on races right here in the city: the most precarious being the 11th District in northeast Queens. If you know people who live in these districts, please let them know how vital their vote is next week.

*Find your district.

2. California Proposition 2.
By now you've either read Fast Food Nation, or you're at least aware of the torturous conditions that cows, pigs, and chickens endure in the name of cheap burgers and wings. I admit, I'm part of the problem (mmm, bacon), but California is endeavoring to take a step in the right direction. As California has earned the reputation as setting the progressive tone for the rest of the country, what passes here stands a big chance of creating a domino effect.

3. California Proposition 8.
That California domino effect is exactly what has conservatives quivering out West. If California allows gay marriage, what could possibly be next other than a total apocalypse, right? Hey, if the apocalypse includes dance music, appletinis, and kickass interior decor, count me in!

4. Minnesota Senate.
Al Franken is pretty much a genius. At least, that's my conclusion after finishing Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair & Balanced Look at the Right last week. If you haven't read it yet, pick it up. And now he's running for US Senate. Just think how much more fun it will be to watch CSPAN... as if it could get any more fun that it already is now!


View all New York candidates and ballot issues here.
(Hint: you won't find a referendum on 3rd terms for NYC mayor or City Council!)

I Predict Many Job Openings in the Secret Service

This absolutely blows my mind. It is so disturbing that I can't even re-type it. Not even cut and paste it! So read it here.

I am a New Yorker AND an American.

Timothy Egan lays out the inanity of equating Americanism your geographical location inside of it.

Whether Americans are real or fake, they can see through Palin, a woman who couldn’t correctly answer a third grader a few days ago when asked to explain the duties of vice president. Somewhere, between the shuffling to costume and accessorize Palin with a $150,000 wardrobe, her handlers never handed her a copy of the Constitution.

Read the full article.

That Other Media Outlet Concerning Meeting, Pressing

A certain nostalgia today when I realized I'd be watching my last "Meet the Press" before the election (next Sunday I'll be running the NYC marathon and I think portable televisions might be considered poor sportsmanship).

John McCain was on today answering Brokaw's very well-chosen questions, mostly with stammering and meaningless phrases, which he'd repeat about four times within his answer. It seemed like he was combing his memory for whichever phrases have received the most applause at recent rallies and making sure we all caught them. And caught them again.

Kudos to Brokaw for stepping in and keeping MTP a great show after the unfortunate loss of Russert. Now if he can just keep everyone from going over the time limit...

Where Do the Candidates Stand On...

Great synopsis on both candidates' stances and plans on each issue in today's Times. Read it here.

In Which The Mayoress Finally Gets the Guts to Convince Her Family to Vote Obama

The very idea of a phone call still makes my palms sweaty, but at least I finally wrote the email to my mom, her husband, my sister, and my brother. I'm fairly certain the first two support McCain, medium certain on my sister, and not sure on my brother. They're all in Oregon. My older sister already voted in Ohio, I'm pretty sure for Obama. My older brother lives in Montreal but I imagine he can still vote.

What is it that makes it so scary for me to just ask them?!? Anyway, here it is:

------------------------------

Hi guys,

I've been procrastinating making this email or calling about the election, but time's up.

As you know, I feel very emotionally invested in this election, but on a practical, real-world level, if we truly share the values I think we do, we absolutely must vote for Obama. None of us make over $250K nor will we within the next four years. We all care about the environment. We all want August to have a good education. I hope we all want the war to end and to have other countries respect us again, and to not have to keep borrowing money from China or give banks tons of money hoping it will all trickle down to the rest of us.

I've been following the candidates as closely as possible so I will answer any questions, or read up:

How your taxes will be affected under Obama:
http://taxcut.barackobama.com/

Healthcare explanation:
http://meetthepressler.blogspot.com/2008/10/health-care-time.html

A good overall summary:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/24/opinion/24fri1.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin


If you plan to vote or have already voted for McCain, I really need to understand why. I just cannot understand why anyone who believes in our country or in all people deserving a fair shot at life would do so.

If you need more persuasion, Colin Powell, Justin Timberlake, and Aunt Bobee are all voting Obama. That's a trifecta if I've ever seen one.

Love,
Ciara

The Times Officially Endorses Obama

"Given the particularly ugly nature of Mr. McCain’s campaign, the urge to choose on the basis of raw emotion is strong. But there is a greater value in looking closely at the facts of life in America today and at the prescriptions the candidates offer. The differences are profound."

Read the full editorial.

Sarah Palin's Wardrobe Budget Has Its Own Tax Bracket

$150,000 in less than two months. On clothes.

ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND FIFTY FUCKING DOLLARS.

I have probably spent a total of $10,000 on clothes in my entire adult life, including shoes and accessories. And I am known where I am known as ever so stylish.

Even Stacey London only gives her makeover victims $5,000 for their new wardrobe on "What Not To Wear."

I really... I don't know where to go with this. It would be one thing if it were socialite Cindy McCain, or even attorney Michelle Obama, or self-made Senator Clinton. But this woman's entire strategy it to glorify the middle class white man (we all know Joe Six-Pack is never substituted with Jose Cuervo Margarita), and she's doing so in a wardrobe that's three times his annual salary?

The Only Time I'll Ever Be Praised by Bush?

You've all received on of these by now I trust?

Absolutely fucking brilliant. You know, except for the whole electoral college thing.

The Only Thing Funnier Than This is the Idea That Anyone in Hollywood is a Republican

This is the true story of 51 councilmembers picked to vote on a plan...

Awesome and smart community organizer Kevin Powell wrote this kick-ass letter to Bloomberg. Kevin ran for congress this year, but you probably know him as the cool guy from the very first season of The Real World.

I met him last spring when Jason (Denver Jason) put on a screening of Chicago 10 (Netflix it!) and he led a Q&A with the director. Kudos to Kevin for explaining what's going on and why Bloomberg [sucks].

I Would Even Change My Name to Mayoress Def

Obama would totally be in trouble if Mos Def ran for Prez, at least in my book.

Actually, someone should play his song "Mr. Nigga" to all the voters who have a problem with race. Click here for lyrics. For those of you who don't speak hip hop, allow me to translate. It's about an established black man who gets treated like a second-class citizen wherever he goes because of his skin color.

Kinda like this true story of former Republican Party Secretary Shannon Reeves (courtesy Al Franken's book): "As a Bush delegate at the 2000 convention in Philadelphia, I proudly wore my delegate's badge and [Republican National Committee] lapel pin as I worked the convention. Regardless of the fact that I was obviously a delegate prominently displaying my credentials, no less than six times did white delegates dismissively tell me to fetch them a taxi or carry their luggage."

On that note, it has gotten to the inexcusable point where the media are portraying race as a legitimate reason for choosing a candidate. I mean it in this way: on The Takeaway this morning I heard race included in the laundry list of reasons that someone might be undecided or voting for McCain, as in "that Obama is black, health care, taxes..." as if skin color is part of a candidate's platform.

People. We agree as a society that racism is WRONG. Journalists are supposed to be somewhat neutral, but I do not think that includes considering racism as anything other than disgusting. The Bradley Effect might be real, but it should not be tolerated.

Peter Vallone Jr Thinks the Term Limits Issue is an Emergency of Epic Proportions

Councilman Peter Vallone Jr, of whom I was formerly a fan because of his stance on NYC sovereignty*, said on WNYC this morning that holding a special election about the term limit extension would be chaos and duh, expensive, so our only choice is for the Council to decide it.

Um, no, Pete. Believe it or not, there's a third option. The original option. Get your resume together or start your mayoral exploratory committee, because two terms is all you get.


*The idea that NYC should become its own state. This sounds stupid but would in fact benefit us because a shameful amount of the money we send to Albany never comes back to us. Also, the state senate is currently a Republican majority. In other words, upstaters essentially echo Palin: damn elite city dwellers, fuck you!

A Brief Analogy For Undecided Voters

“To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. 'Can I interest you in the chicken?' she asks. 'Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?' To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.” -- David Sedaris

Maddow About You*

Today's #1 article on NYTimes.com is about Rachel Maddow's crazy good ratings on her new show. Hello, I only just started watching Olbermann. Slow down, MSNBC!

But the most curious thing to me in this article was the "25-to-54" demographic. What? Hello? Are there any 54 year olds out there with the same viewing habits as the average 25 year old? Or the real reason behind ratings: how many advertisters are really aiming at both? Why the 30-year spread? Sure, my mom and I may both click over to CNN, but I doubt her regular viewing habits include rushing home for Gossip Girl or watching True Blood on demand or dedicating her Saturday to America's Best Dance Crew reruns.

*Yes, I know. Negative points for corny title. I hang my head in shame.

I Also Would Like to Decide My Own Raises and How Long I Keep My Own Job.

I've been delaying the blog on what's going on in NYC politics for a few reasons - part disbelief, part frustration - both at our elected officials and at the public for not being bailout-package-level outraged at the current executive power grab.

Mayor Mike Bloomberg (pictured left with another hustler) decided he wants a third term as mayor. NYC mayors may serve up to two terms (8 years) under current law. This was supported by two separate votes by the citizens of New York in the 90's. Instead of putting this on the November 4 ballot, he is taking it to the City Council to enforce. Just so happens the City Councilmembers also are limited to two terms (just 4 years) under this law. And most of them are term-limited out next year. How do you think they'll vote?

In other words, I want my job longer and I will make it so. Did I mention I also vote on my own raises? Which may be irrelevant when applied to our billionaire mayor, but not for the Council, which makes $120K annually in what's considered a "part-time job." That's right, they're allowed to have another job while serving.

And Bloomberg's half-ass justification for usurping the democratic process is that we are in tough economic times, so we need a mayor who is a businessman. But Bloomberg was pushing for this well before the economic crisis fully hit. And the mayor of New York City really doesn't have a whole lot to do with the National Treasury.

So what if you like Bloomberg? Great! Name a street after him! An airport even! But don't change a law that we voted to uphold. Because it won't just apply to Bloomberg.

The most common justification for eliminating term limits altogether is, "The voters have a term limit device every few years -- it's called an election." But the sad truth is that most people don't even know who their councilperson is, so what are the chances they'll vote the incumbent out of office?

I'm personally not a big Bloomberg fan. Not only is he a Republican, he's a big donor to George W. Bush. He wanted us to have the Olympics, as if this city needs any more construction. It also took the first four years for him to realize there are boroughs outside of Manhattan.

Here is how the City Council responded to NY1's question: "Do you plan to support the mayor's bill to extend term limits?" as of this morning. Click on your councilmember to email him/her and express your opinion.

(Kudos to Bill Thompson (right), NYC Comptroller and #1 Facebook friend, for leading a lot of the opposition to what's going on.)

RESPONDED "YES"

*Maria Baez, (D) Bronx
*Leroy Comrie, (D) Queens
*Erik Martin Dilan, (D) Brooklyn
*Lewis Fidler, (D) Brooklyn
*Robert Jackson, (D) Manhattan
*G. Oliver Koppell, (D) Bronx
*Miguel Martinez, (D) Manhattan
*Michael Nelson, (D) Brooklyn
*Christine Quinn, (D) Manhattan
*Domenic Recchia, (D) Brooklyn
*Diana Reyna, (D) Brooklyn
*Joel Rivera, (D) Bronx
*Larry Seabrook, (D) Bronx
*Helen Sears, (D) Queens
*Kendall Stewart, (D) Brooklyn
*Al Vann, (D) Brooklyn

RESPONDED "NO"

*Joseph Addabbo, (D) Queens
*Tony Avella, (D) Queens
*Charles Barron, (D) Brooklyn
Anthony Como, (R) Queens
*Bill de Blasio, (D) Brooklyn
Mathieu Eugene, (D) Brooklyn
Daniel Garodnick, (D) Manhattan
*James Gennaro, (D) Queens
Vincent Gentile, (D) Brooklyn
*Eric Gioia, (D) Queens
Vincent Ignizio, (R) Staten Island
Letitia James, (D) Brooklyn
*John Liu, (D) Queens
Melissa Mark-Viverito, (D) Manhattan
Darlene Mealy, (D) Brooklyn
Rosie Mendez, (D) Manhattan
*Hiram Monserrate, (D) Queens
Annabel Palma, (D) Bronx
James Vacca, (D) Bronx
*David Weprin, (D) Queens

RESPONDED "UNDECIDED"

Maria del Carmen Arroyo, (D) Bronx
*Gale Brewer, (D) Manhattan
Inez Dickens, (D) Manhattan
*Simcha Felder, (D) Brooklyn
*Helen Foster, (D) Bronx
*Alan Gerson, (D) Manhattan
Sara Gonzalez, (D) Brooklyn
*Melinda Katz, (D) Queens
Jessica Lappin, (D) Manhattan
*Michael McMahon, (D) Staten Island
*James Oddo, (R) Staten Island
*James Sanders, (D) Queens
*Peter Vallone, (D) Queens
Tom White, (D) Queens
*David Yassky, (D) Brooklyn

I'z in ur ballut bocks, stealin' ur elekshun.

There's nothing better for the 4pm work wall than a few laughs inspired by the LOLCats. Which made me wonder... has anyone transferred the trend to the nominees?

Oh silly Ciara! By the time you've thought of something, it's already all over Teh Internets!!1!

Stop Praising Stupidity

Here's a great article on how ridiculous it is that Palin won't be subjected to any sort of scrutiny, continuing to either knowingly lie or allow herself to be a puppet.

Speaking of, is there anyone out there that actually thinks this is the right kind of feminism? That putting someone up for a role for which she is unqualified, then praising her for her looks and winks and number of children is progress?

And shame on George W. Bush and his followers for turning intellectual inquiry into a bad thing -- praising "don't blink" confidence over diplomacy, intellect, and measured deliberation. Please God, give me a politician who "flip flops" -- that is, changes his or her stance on an issue when the relevant facts or circumstances shift -- over someone who refuses an exit plan, eschews checks and balances, or continues support tax breaks for the wealthy in a time of economic crisis.

No Pity for McCain

Check out Frank Rich's editorial in today's Times.

As the G.O.P.’s long night of the long knives begins, myths are already setting in among the right’s storm troops and the punditocracy alike as to what went wrong. And chief among them are the twin curses of Bush and the “headwinds” of the economy. No Republican can win if the party’s incumbent president is less popular than dirt, we keep being told, or if a looming Great Depression 2 is Issue No. 1.

This is an excuse, not an explanation. It absolves McCain of much of the blame and denies Obama much of the credit for their campaigns. It arouses pity for McCain when he deserves none. It rewrites history.

Religulous

Last night I saw Religulous, Bill Mahar's documentary on religion and its effect on society and the individual. Guys, this film in definitely in the required viewing column. You'll laugh, you'll get offended, but when he brings it home with the final monologue, you will be stirred. His overall conclusion is dead on - no spoilers here, but just go see it.

The Ridiculously Hot and Talented and Also Hot Demographic

I might as well just end this blog right now because

Justin Timberlake has come out in support of Obama

Middle America! What more do you f'ing want?!

Investment Advice

Courtesy Kaki.

If you had purchased $1,000 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you would have $49 left.

With Fannie Mae, you would have $2.50 left of the original $1,000.

With AIG, you would have less than $15 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drunk all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214 cash.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

Health Care Time!

Our office just met with our health insurance broker about changes in our plan. At the end of the meeting, Aaron B. asked Broker Josh which candidate's health plan he thinks is better. To his credit, Broker Josh tried to stay neutral in giving his two cents, but I think by the end we all knew who he'll be voting for come November.

"I think Obama's plan makes so much more sense for now and for the future," he said.

He then explained that here in New York, an independent plan for a single person would cost about $780 per month. So with McCain's $5,000 tax credit, which equals about $420 per month, I'd be paying over $350 per month out of my pocket. There go my savings and 401K contributions.

He explained that now, companies mainly insure the moderately to very sick. This is why current costs are so high. If the healthy are added to that mix, it brings down the overall risk to the insurance company because they're keeping more of the money coming in from those who don't need medical care as often.

Or think of it this way: if the healthy to moderately healthy that are now insured opted out under McCain's plan because they'd rather take the risk than pay so much, as I did in my mid-20's when my employer didn't provide insurance, imagine how much more expensive premiums would have to get to cover the sick.

Obama's plan "could be the answer now and in the future for how we curb the increase in health care costs."

Let's just hope Josh's two cents don't have to come out of a $5K tax credit next year.

Debate Review

"Wednesday night’s debate was another chance for Mr. McCain to prove that he is ready to lead this country out of its deep economic crisis. But he had one answer to almost every economic question: cut taxes and government spending. Unfortunately, what Mr. McCain means is to cut taxes for the richest Americans and, inevitably, to reduce the kinds of government services that working Americans need more than ever."

I'm going to send this article to my family and friends who are still undecided or leaning McCain. Check it out and do the same.

JOE THE PLUMBER EXPOSED!!

Who exactly is Joe the Plumber, mentioned over 20 times in last night's debate?

The new Republican hero is actually Samuel Wurzelbacher, who would in fact NOT pay more taxes under Obama's plan if his planned plumbing business made $250K next year, who lied about belonging to the Toledo plumbers' union, and who owes back taxes.

Doesn't want to pay taxes? No wonder he's a Republican!

Tax Facts

Click here to view a short film by Gen Art alumnus Josh Frankel on the tax policies of our presidential candidates.

Trains

Thanks to Aaron for this one...

Et tu, Palin?

I often wonder, narcissist that she is, if Palin has a perpetual hard-on from all the attention she's getting.

Did this Miss Alaska runner-up ever dream she'd be on the front page of every media outlet (none of which she reads anyway)? Depicted on Saturday Night Live? Depicted in porn?

As a former actress, I do feel a speck of pity identifying with the post-show depression that's going to hit like a ton of bricks on November 5. The media requests will fade as quickly as the notion of Bristolian reproductive (and nuptial) choice.

I picture Sarah after a long day of mugging for the media she claims to shun, parading around on the Grammatical Massacre Express, giggling in a bubble bath, surrounded by Newsweeks and Posts and Peoples, Fox News playing in the background, sipping sparkling apple cider and flushed with excitement at all the a-t-t-e-n-t-i-o-n.

But as usual, Dowd is one step ahead: she's now writing so far above Palin's head, Ms. Maverick'll need a ladder past her supposed glass ceiling cracks to get it.

Note to Sarah: Latin is not what Latinos speak.

The Double Standard Continues

From Frank Rich's column on Saturday:

No less disconcerting was a still-unexplained passage of Palin’s convention speech: Her use of an unattributed quote praising small-town America (as opposed to, say, Chicago and its community organizers) from Westbrook Pegler, the mid-century Hearst columnist famous for his anti-Semitism, racism and violent rhetorical excess. After an assassin tried to kill F.D.R. at a Florida rally and murdered Chicago’s mayor instead in 1933, Pegler wrote that it was “regrettable that Giuseppe Zangara shot the wrong man.” In the ’60s, Pegler had a wish for Bobby Kennedy: “Some white patriot of the Southern tier will spatter his spoonful of brains in public premises before the snow falls.”

This is the writer who found his way into a speech by a potential vice president at a national political convention. It’s astonishing there’s been no demand for a public accounting from the McCain campaign. Imagine if Obama had quoted a Black Panther or Louis Farrakhan — or William Ayers — in Denver.

Walking the Walk

Yesterday I volunteered on the Obama campaign, calling voters in Indiana. Shout out to Farmland, Lafayette, and the whole 765!

For those who know me, I'm a pretty outgoing girl, but I was so nervous calling people! So I just funneled that into being extremely polite. Probably too polite, because when people were undecided, instead of engaging them on the issues, I said, "Okay! Well, as I'm sure you know, election day is November 4, and I hope you take some time between now and then to go online and read up on the issues! Thank you so much for your time and have a lovely day!" This in my Nordstrom-crafted customer service voice. You'd think I was selling baby cribs.

Anyway, calling is super easy to do, and a way to actually DO something to get Barack elected rather than sitting around biting our nails every time another person acts like a complete idiot at a McCain rally.

Click here to learn how you can call right from your own home.

After the phone banking, I walked down 5th Avenue in my Obama shirt, which in my estimation, is one of the best things I can do for the campaign. I mean, people love that shirt. I imagine some Ohio tourist walking out of the Met Museum and thinking to his undecided self, "Wow, look at that really cool shirt. That girl may be a cosmopolitan elitist, but if cos-elites get to look that fashion-forward, I'm on board for Obama too!" Also, I try to wear it with short skirts. Hey, the male vote is pretty persuadable.

This technique sort of backfired back in '04 when I wore my self-designed "I [Heart] Teresa Heinz Kerry" shirt with a denim mini and purple ostrich boots, reasoning that my legs would draw the attention and the eye would move upward to get the real message. Hello, I'm in marketing.

Instead, a woman on the L Train began praying out loud for me. She was absolutely scandalized. Not sure why - I'm pretty sure the Guy she was praying to was also the Guy responsible for the very legs she was praying for. That, and three months of marathon training.

Anyway, vote Obama! He's the candidate of leggy fashion enthusiasts!

(For heaven's, can you imagine me on the real Meet the Press? Brokaw would ask me about economic policy and I'd probably respond with the top ten happy hours in Manhattan... does that make me a Jill six-pack?)

Yeah. Drill.

Thanks to Neil Chambers for this gem.

Double Standards

Thanks to Larken for this forward which captures a lot of things that have crossed my mind while watching the debates and recent character attacks from the GOP camp. Kudos to Obama/Biden for keeping things remarkably above-board.

Obama/Biden vs McCain/Palin, what if things were switched around?....think about it.

Would the country's collective point of view be different? Could racism be the culprit?

Ponder the following:

What if the Obamas had paraded five children across the stage, including a three month old infant and an unwed, pregnant teenage daughter?

What if John McCain was a former president of the Harvard Law Review?

What if Barack Obama finished fifth from the bottom of his graduating class?

What if McCain had only married once, and Obama was a divorcee?

What if Obama was the candidate who left his first wife after a severe disfiguring car accident, when she no longer measured up to his standards?

What if Obama had met his second wife in a bar and had a long affair while he was still married?

What if Michelle Obama was the wife who not only became addicted to painkillers but also acquired them illegally through her charitable organization?

What if Cindy McCain graduated from Harvard?

What if Obama had been a member of the Keating Five?(The Keating Five were five United States Senators accused of corruption in 1989, igniting a major political scandal as part of the larger Savings and Loan crisis of the late 1980s and early 1990s.)

What if McCain was a charismatic, eloquent speaker?

What if Obama couldn't read from a teleprompter?

What if Obama was the one who had military experience that included discipline problems and a record of crashing seven planes?

What if Obama was the one who was known to display publicly, on many occasions, a serious anger management problem?

What if Michelle Obama's family had made their money from beer distribution?

What if the Obamas had adopted a white child?

You could easily add to this list. If these questions reflected reality, do you really believe the election numbers would be as close as they are?

This is what racism does. It covers up, rationalizes and minimizes positive qualities in one candidate and emphasizes negative qualities in another when there is a color difference.

Educational Background:

Barack Obama:
Columbia University - B.A. Political Science with a Specialization in
International Relations.
Harvard - Juris Doctor (J.D.) Magna Cum Laude

Joseph Biden:
University of Delaware - B.A. in History and B.A. in Political Science.
Syracuse University College of Law - Juris Doctor (J.D.)

vs.

John McCain:
United States Naval Academy - Class rank: 894 of 899

Sarah Palin:
Hawaii Pacific University - 1 semester
North Idaho College - 2 semesters - general study
University of Idaho - 2 semesters -journalism
Matanuska-Susitna College - 1 semester
University of Idaho - 3 semesters - B.A. in Journalism


Education isn't everything, but this is about the two highest offices in the land as well as our standing in the world.

You make the call.

Do the Hustle!

Talk about global impact: the world's markets ricocheted off of yesterday's incredible 700+ point plunge in the Dow, with two nations suspending trading altogether. Can't say I blame them.

This morning the US markets already dipped below 8,000 for a moment - and just a year ago we went over 14,000 points. Ah, the good ol' days.

But wait! President Bush says not to worry. And! "America's workers are the most talented and productive workers in the world!"

Oh really, Prez? I think India would take issue with that one... and all the American companies that send jobs over there. Yeah, Citibank, I'm talking to you.

I've yet to open the envelopes of my last two investment statements. I can't say ignorance is bliss, but it at least avoids nightmares of retiring at 90.

For the third time, McCain’s campaign uses music without permission

From Prefixmag.com, 10/8/08

The Republican Party has courted plenty of trouble with its appropriation of popular songs during the presidential election campaign.

Heart’s Nancy Wilson memorably said she felt “completely fucked over” by Sarah Palin’s use of the band’s “Barracuda,” while Van Halen asked John McCain to stop using their Sammy Hagar-era song “Right Now.”

Now Foo Fighters have stepped into the breach, issuing a statement denouncing McCain’s use of “My Hero” during his campaign. Here’s the official statement from the band:

"This isn't the first time the McCain campaign has used a song without making any attempt to get approval or permission from the artist. It's frustrating and infuriating that someone who claims to speak for the American people would repeatedly show such little respect for creativity and intellectual property. The saddest thing about this is that 'My Hero' was written as a celebration of the common man and his extraordinary potential. To have it appropriated without our knowledge and used in a manner that perverts the original sentiment of the lyric just tarnishes the song. We hope that the McCain campaign will do the right thing and stop using our song--and start asking artists' permission in general!"

"Get Your Fat Jewish Asses on a Plane to Florida."

“For whatever reason,” she recalled, “I felt it would be a good idea to have half a pot cookie. Just as it hit me, they’re like, ‘Sarah, meet Al Gore.’ And then someone took a picture. It’s him looking terrified, and me with my hands up, like I’m saying, ‘Raaahhhh, I’m a monster.’ ” -- Sarah Silverman, as quoted in The New York Times

I hope you've all seen this by now....



The Sarah Silverman Program returns to Comedy Central tonight. Yessss.

"We're not laughing with you, we're laughing AT you." - SNL writers

Read this Daily Intel for comments like "She needs to focus on the country and the economy. What a hopeless narcissist. Stop the self promotion. Your 15 minutes are coming to an end."

Brill.

****Back by Popular Demand****

That's right kids. Like OJ Simpson in the courtroom, like LL Cool J in the first line of Mama Said Knock You Out, like the McCain campaign after its earth-shattering 24-hour suspension, I'm back.

I'd originally only wanted to blog through my experience at the DNC, which itself didn't get the neat wrap-up when my Mac imploded upon my return to NYC. I guess I'm a PC. Ooh! I'm also a CP! I digress.

But now that I find myself sending election-related emails on the daily, and then last night Anthony said "why don't you keep writing in your blog?" (never mind the Jameson he was drinking while making this suggestion; I'm sure it had nothing to do with it), I feel compelled to put all my political thoughts (and links to NY Times editorials) in one electronic place.

But mostly because the country is a complete total f-ing mess.

Since I last blogged, the economy has collapsed, each of us has contributed $2,300 to the bailout (aside from all the money we've lost in our investments), a hurricane hit Texas causing billions in damage, I've pulled my hair out through three debates, vomited in my own mouth watching Couric, the SNL writer can pretty much take a vacation until November, and worst of all:

SARAH PALIN IS STILL THE GOP VP CANDIDATE.

It's on.

The Race Issue

"[Palin's] demagoguery has elicited some frightening, intolerable responses. A recent Washington Post report said at a rally in Florida this week a man yelled “kill him!” as Ms. Palin delivered that line and others shouted epithets at an African-American member of a TV crew." - NY Times 10/8

I don't see Obama as black. This is not because I'm colorblind, above race -- if only. It's because, like Obama, my father was black and my mother is white; I too grew up in the West where races are more integrated (if you're an optimist, "ignored" if you're more skeptical); and as was pointed out in the excellent New York magazine issue on race this past summer, I grew up understanding my race more intellectually than experientially.

And unlike Obama, but perfectly explained in Danzy Senna's essay "The Mulatto Millennium" in the wonderful book Half & Half, I grew up "passing" as white and enjoyed all the corresponding privileges. I did not check the race box on my college applications. It was not until I moved to New York that I began exploring what my mix means to me, simply because I didn't need to.

So probably because of all this, I don't see a black man when I look at Obama. I just see someone I sort of identify with, you know, aside from the whole Harvard-educated, served in the Senate, going to be president thing. I am not a subscriber to the one-drop rule. I see multiracial as a whole separate category.

I know this is enormously unpopular because 95% of the racism I've personally experienced in my life has been from black people because I am not black enough, I don't date enough black men, I'm not frustrated enough with my hair. To all the haters, I do love hip hop and wearing track suits, so step off.

I could go on and on and on about race, but for now I'm content to leave that to the years I spent exploring and writing about these issues with the New York theatre collective Mixed Company, to The Assimilated Negro, to Randall Kennedy, to Danzy Senna. Although I'm sure, considering our candidate and my own unique position on the color spectrum, I'll be writing about it again in the not so distant future.